Registration Issues

funny cartoon scientistI’ve been working ALL day and then coming home at night every night since June to work on the site. I think I actually fixed the registration issue and a few other things. We still have things that need “doing” but for now a lot of the kinks have been worked out. To help support the site and the new book (we’re going to be shopping it after Labor Day), you can go HERE and see how you can help. Most things you can do to help support the site will cost NOTHING and anything you do spend goes right back into the site. Thank you all for your support and your patience!!!

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8/22 Check in Post

Green Check MarkHow is everyone doing??

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On Rising Up From the Ashes

abstract swirl of blue on a black backgroundThis was one of the first posts I wrote on the blog. I wrote the long saga of how the blog became a book over the past few days (under To Publication under pages, not that I expect anyone to read all the way through it but some people interested in publishing and others interested in how the blog became a book have been asking…) and to refresh my recollection of which blogs were written first, I was reading the through the first few blog posts and thought this would be a good one to run.  This is one that is partially in the book. Unedited from the original December 2006.

“It is by going down into the abyss that we recover the treasures of life. Where you stumble, there lies your treasure.” -Joseph Campbell

When I first left my marriage, I was convinced it was the right thing for about 24 hours. Then I felt plunged into a darkness I had never known before or since. I woke up on day 2 feeling as if I was unraveling. I couldn’t understand it, but I had next to no ability to even begin to understand anything, let alone this HUGE emotional upheaval I seemed to be having. Continue reading

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GPYB Recommends

Recommended iconSeveral people have asked, over the past month, for a reading “list.” I threw something together this morning for someone who is traveling this evening but will add to it later and over the weekend. It’s here:

GPYB Recommends and will remain on the PAGES at the top of the blog.

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Book #3 Contributions

VorlageFor those who are new, I’m writing a new book based on this post:

New instructions for sharing your story & please resend if you already have:

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Life Isn’t Fair. Never Has Been. Never Will Be.

Grief is an important part of moving on. It’s important to feel as bad as you really feel. It’s important to give credence to your grief and your hurt. But it’s also important to take time out (especially as the process goes on) and live your life. Yesterday was another anniversary for me and I could feel myself getting a bit funky. It’s okay to do.

But the other thing is that gratitude for what you do have is important.
Continue reading

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August NC CHIPS!!!!!!

We did our last NC chip post toward the end of June so I skipped July.  But now we have a few new people struggling with NC, so please share trials, tribulations, successes, how you did it and what you’re doing to celebrate.

How it works is explained after the jump (the Continue Reading link).



Continue reading

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8/11 Check In

Green Check MarkWe’re just about half way through August. How is everyone doing?


The GPYB Facebook Page

The GPYB Psychology Today Page

The GPYB YouTube Channel

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Recovering From Bad Love

stop the painI run this a couple of times a year. It’s from Women Who Love Too Much but it can be applied for anyone recovering from unhealthy relationships. These are signs that you are INDEED recovering.

As someone who went from being a horribly sick individual in horrifically dangerous, destructive relationships to being a TOTALLY recovered WWL2M who was in a long-term relationship with someone who never once made me cry or called me a name or did anything untoward to me, who told me early on, “I want to make you the happiest person on Earth,” and then DID, all while supporting my individual goals and pursuits no matter how small (I want to start walking in the morning) or large (I want to go to law schoool), I can tell you that this is not only possible but it’s the only way to go through life. Don’t settle for some of this…go for ALL OF IT!!!!!!!
Continue reading

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Rejection & The Hit To Self-Esteem

rejection1I wrote this a long time ago, but it’s true today. And I’m writing the new book which is ALL about rejection and rejecting the rejection. And this is for Football Girl and anyone else who needs it. I have not edited the original (and Michael was here so he’s mentioned). Whenever I read back on things that happened when he was here and well and I think of the STUPID things I was obsessing about instead of enjoying my life, I get angry. Don’t let people rent space in your head they don’t pay for:
Continue reading

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Reboot Pathological Narcissist

npdI’m working on the NPD section of the new book, and edited and reworked the Pathological Narcissist post.
It’s here:
The Pathological Narcissist

Feel free to share your experiences!

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Uh…NO…Trolls Will Troll

snavatar1A Twitter troll (not interested in anything that I’ve done, just a bunch of empty noise) said that having “aromatherapy” in my profile damages my credibility. This whole thing started as a mission to make healthy products for my family. In addition to the “me night” products, I designed a line of men’s products that men seem to LOVE and all profits go to the Michael A. DiCarlo Brain Tumor Foundation (this is managed by Fidelity and is a true 501(c) charity). It’s only been a few months that we’ve been public and things are going well. I had an awesome response at a Farmer’s Market I did yesterday.

I support small beekeepers in an effort to help the planet and save the bees. So I’ve “enhanced” the page explaining it and GPYB readers get a 20 percent discount on SN products. Having passion about any thing that is outside your normal range of interests does not damage your credibility and anyone who thinks so is a fool. It also calms me greatly. Making products with beeswax from small local beekeepers is AMAZING. The smell is incredible. I also infuse my oils with herbs, calendula, chamomile, lavender etc etc. When Michael was sick I learned to make salve for him with plaintain and calendula and it helped his psoriasis so much I didn’t have to buy the $500 tube of medication the doctor prescribed for him and I kept my promise to him not to send him back to the hospital. Had he gotten a bed sore I would have had to have put him in the hospital. I couldn’t AFFORD the cream so I made the salve and it was AMAZING and I kept my promise to him.

Almost all my products contain either infused oils, beeswax from small beekeepers or BOTH. (many contain both). I truly truly truly love what I’m doing and WHY I’m doing it and that I get to donate to beekeepers and Michael’s charity and offer non-GMO, no palm oil, no parabens, no silicones, no animal products, no many other bad things! I work hard to make sure my herbs are certified, our bath salts are certified, our products are organic, non-GMO etc etc. I feel so GREAT about these products and I love love love making them. It’s meditative to me and really helps me think.


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First, welcome to the blog! Second, if you have trouble registering, email me at AT gmail DOT com
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7/19 Check in Thread

Green Check MarkHow is everyone doing? If you posted recently in the last check in thread, feel free to repost here!

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Site Issue Updates

Website building , under construction or repairThank you for all the support for both book. PLEASE keep up the reviews and tweeting about both books on Twitter/ sharing the books on FB and liking the FB page, the YouTube videos, the PT articles etc.

Please see after the jump more ways to keep the site going and to help us shop the new book. Thanks all!

Not to pander, but I’ve been running this site for 10 years and it’s not self-sufficient mostly because I’ve hated to put ads all over the site or ask for money. It could do a lot better but I really despise putting ads all over when people are hurting and just want to TALK about it and get support. These are ways you can HELP support the site so I don’t need to resort to MORE ads (I do need to run some just to help the site).

But there are things you can do without any money and if you do spend money, it goes right back into the site. Have you ever been on a site and you can’t even READ what you want to read because ads are flying all over the place? I DON’T WANT THAT TO BE THAT WAY HERE!!! So to avoid that, we need to help it just a teensy bit.

We’re going to be shopping the new book in Sept so getting the views/reviews/sales of GBOT up there will help. But if you can’t spend any $ here are ways you can help:

GBOT could use plugs and reviews.(actually it needs a lot more than GPYB)..SO THANK YOU!!!!! And it’s worldwide, not just U.S. so wherever you are! (Canada and the UK are awesome about the books!)

The books (GPYB and GBOT) reviews and sales and exposure are a HUGE part of getting it sold, so please please review and tweet and instagram and pinterest and facebook about them!) ). THANK YOU (I can’t thank you all enough!)

I’ve been spending lots of money on the site and try not to have a lot of intrusive links and ads (some sites are so ridiculous) and as many of you who have been here for years know, I never make money on the site and it is not my intention to make money on the site, just cover its bills which I don’t always do. If the rare month comes along where income exceeds expense, I donate books to DV shelters or Michael’s foundation (which is a true 503(c) charity).

I don’t normally ask for money and won’t here, but the past few weeks MONTHS have cost me a bunch of money that I really don’t have. I hit a wall every 6 months or so about running the blog and I’m trying to keep it here. Some months are tougher than others. I hope the blog continues to be a great resource. I have written over 3000 posts in 9 years and I try to post things in response to things that people write in comments. I hope to keep that going as new people come aboard.

There are ways to support the site. Most cost nothing:

1. Share on the blog! The more sharing, the more popular the blog is, the more traffic etc etc (you know how it goes.) If you want to write a guest post, please do! It’s been a while since we had one.

2. Share ON the blog and share THE blog: please share our posts on your Facebook page and Twitter feed (any of them, the old ones are fine).

3. Like our Facebook page on Facebook.

4. Review both books on Amazon and other bookseller sites. I’m putting a link to the Order page because I know that some of you use other sites and not everyone is in the US. Each link should take you to the site. If it doesn’t, please let me know (they change from time to time).

Reviews are important for the THIRD book and sales are as well (GPYB is doing great of course but GBOT not as much).

5. Subscribe to the YouTube channel and like the videos. Tweet and share your faves on FB.

6. Read our Psychology Today articles (we get paid – not a lot- by views) and PLEASE tweet them and share on Facebook. The most important ones are the ones on abuse, the “When The Person You Love…” and the grief ones. Don’t worry that they have been there a while. It’s okay to tweet and share older articles.

The new book is based on this article:
so sharing it and liking it is GREAT. It’s almost up to a million views!

7. Buy from our aromatherapy site: (and you can also like the facebook page and follow on twitter ALL profits from the MAD Molto Virile men’s products go to the Michael A. DiCarlo Brain Cancer Foundation.

If you shop Splendida Nutrita, there is a 20 percent discount for GPYBers…put GPYB in as a discount code when you check out. Free shipping over $50

8. If you’re going to buy on Amazon anyway, please use our associate link to access Amazon. We used to get about 7 percent of sales but it’s down around 5 percent of late so people have stopped using our links. If you’re going there anyway, please go there from here. :) :

GBOT on Amazon U.S. with our link

GPYB on Amazon U.S.with our link

For other countries, please go to the Order Page above. There should be a gazillion links to the books. If the place where you buy books is missing, please let me know and I’ll add it!!!

9. Buy the workbook (link above). Workbook sales go IMMEDIATELY into the site. Any “extras” at the end of the month go to book sales to donate to DV shelters and Michael’s foundation. No profit on the workbook ever.


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